Beethoven's' Bowel Movement? What are those sick Maggot Punks up to now?

We decided to assist those less fortunate today. There are some people in this world who have a hard time with reality. They depend on delusions to make it through their lives. The Maggot Punks have been guilty of force feeding reality to some of them, so today, we will make it up to them.

One of the less fortunate is a person who passes for a journalist at the Wichita Eagle. His name is Dion Lefler. Dion needs to believe that he is morally and intellectually superior to everyone in every way. On August 31 of 2004 he wrote of a vast atheist conspiracy that he had uncovered through his skills as an "investigative reporter" (he just walked outside and picked up a flyer that the Maggot Punks had put up near his place of employment). He also referred to the "profanity laced tirades" at the Maggot Punks website. Dig Doug Deeper, being the mean terrible Maggot Punk that he is, set the record straight when he provided a written rebuttal to Lefler's article. After that we realized that we were being

insensitive to Dion. After all, his self esteem is based on telling lies about others. So we named today's article "Beethoven's' Bowel Movement" so he could say that we write "profanity laced tirades" and continue living in his fantasy world.

Lynn and Karen McBride also live in fantasy world that we have poked holes in. These two run the Wichita Chronicle and consider plagiarism a valid form of journalism. They also have delusions of persecution. They believe that a vast atheist network, run by the Maggot Punks, has targeted them and the Wichita Chronicle. They beleive that the Maggot Punks follow them around and steal their free newspaper.

The McBride's nor Lefler need any type of evidence or proof of anything they say or believe. They expect everyone to simply take their word as gold.

The Maggot Punks, however, hold ourselves to a little bit higher standard

than that. We require, even of ourselves, evidence to back our claims. So today, we will make a few contentions and then back them up with solid evidence.

Contention 1: Frakendork is an absolute idiot.

Despite an email from Karen Layton insisting that Frakendork is beautiful and intelligent, further investigation has reveled that she is, in fact, repulsive and stupid. Simply click here to see a few pictures of her and then click here (3:09 25.3MB)to watch a video of her loosing her baby blanket to the Maggot Punks.

In the video, Frakendork keeps trying to give patients a baby blanket. When one of the patient companions accepts, she hands it to him and then he, forthrightly, hands it to us. Then she demands we give it back or she will "call what I wanna call".

Since beauty is in the eye of the beholder, an argument could be made that Frakendork might look good after 2 or 3 gallons of Scotch. However, intelligence can be measured by actions.

We can further deduce that Frakendork is a dumbass by the actions of her mother.

Today at the clinic, Frakenmother showed up with a doll. Right at first we thought it was a real baby but it turned out to be Emily. Now we estimate that Frakenmother is at least 40 years old and our question is; why is she still playing with dolls?

Contention 2: Jeff Herzog is an absolute idiot.

Jeff had asked DDD for some scientific evidence supporting evolution a few weeks ago. DDD showed up at the clinic this morning with evidence in hand, just as he had promised. DDD went to present the report to Jeff with Mr Zero in tow running the camera. Jeff seemed a little shy about discussing this on camera but agreed to look at it and come up with some replies. He also stated that there is more scientific evidence that supports creationism than there is evidence to support evolution. Click here (1:17 8.7MB) to watch a video of Jeff being presented with the report.

About an hour later, Jeff said he wanted to talk to Doug. Doug went to talk to him and he tried to weasel out of it because he didn't want to be on camera. Doug simply started a conversation with him. Click here (13:28 88.7MB) to watch a video of the whole thing.

Now that is an awful big file. If you would like to see the highlights, click here (1:15 5.9MB).

Contention 3: Dickie is a bitter and violent short man.

After having some physical run-in's with Dickie in the past, we are always pleased when he shows up at the clinic. Today we witnessed Dickie giving the most aggressive version of the lord's prayer that we had ever heard. Click here (3:37 18.9MB) to see a video of it.

We had gone to talk to Jeff about evolution when Dickie decided to interrupt the conversation with his inspid chanting. He gets right up next to Mr Zero and DDD as to try to intimidate them. Click here (3:37 18.9MB) to watch a video of the whole thing.

Later, DDD and Mr Zero return and find Dickie complaining to the clinic security gaud. He says that we did something to irritate him. He says he will talk to us down, individually, down on the corner but is incapable of speaking his mind where he stands. He can't argue with two Maggot Punks at one time. Click here (1:44 12.5MB) to see a video of the whole thing.

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